Wrongful Palette: Self Portrait with Head Wound

I've been bald (male pattern) to some degree since high school. Perhaps because of the joyful abuse my youthful peers showered on me, I got over it pretty quick and it's never been an issue for me. If I could take a pill and grow a full head of hair, I wouldn't do it. In fact, if I could take a pill that would erase the last of my hair and leave me cue-ball bald I'd do it. Over the years a lot of women responded to my baldness the same way some guys respond to large breasts, i.e., as a clear gender signal. Obviously not all women like bald men, but a surprising number do.

I've also been fair skinned all my life. This resulted in numerous sun burns growing up in Florida. In the '60s and '70s we just didn't use sun block, or if we did, it was a bright white zinc paste that was used on the nose. In any event, I pre-populated my scalp with lots of sites that want to turn into skin cancer. Nothing has gotten out of hand, but I use Carac cream frequently. This stuff is like leprosy in a tube. It's the same stuff used in chemo-therapy, but in convenient cream form! It kills cells that divide. Since cancer cells divide more frequently, it statistically kills them first. But after a while, you start to look like a red tattered mess.

Sometimes the spots get too aggressive and cutting them out is the only option. I've had the equivalent of half a face lift since the left side of my scalp seems to be the main site (so is my left arm, which makes me think that I'm paying the price for years of 'trucker tans'.) More recently I had Moh's Surgery for some of this pre-cancer on my forehead. While the (outpatient) surgery was underway, I asked if I could take a quick snapshot. The Dermatologist was surprised, but didn't mind as I held the camera at arm's length and took this shot.

With this picture in hand, I decided to drop it down to grayscale and limit the number of levels.

I liked the contrasts and started working up a freehand sketch of the image at the right scale for the canvas (16"x20")

The idea for the piece was that the hole in my head was providing a way to see what was inside, but in a more metaphorical than anatomical sense. I started gathering bits and pieces of items to form a collage of my mental landscape. I wanted this to stand out from the painted image, so I prepared a traced copy of my sketch and built the collage into the area outside the face.

Once I ModgePodged this into a solid unit, I cut it out and (using yet more of the wonderful ModgePodge,) adhered it onto the canvas. I had already done a graphite transfer from a tracing of the sketch onto the canvas, so the pieces fit together nicely.

Next I began painting in the image. I used acrylics and I wanted to stick to a very limited white/grey/black palette for everything on the face except the wound. I tried a number of techniques, relying on mostly drybrush to get the effect I wanted. I started by laying in the grey foundation.